January 22, 2004


Dean's Top Ten List

The Baltimore Sun caught a glimpse of the supposedly secret taping of Howard Dean presenting the "Top Ten List" on David Letterman's Late Show.

Ways, I, Howard Dean, can turn things around.

10. Switch to decaf.
9. Unveil new slogan, "Vote for Dean and get one dollar off your next purchase at Blimpie."
8. Marry Rachel on the final episode of Friends.
7. Don't change a thing, it's going great.
6. Show a little more skin.
5. Go on American Idol and give them a taste of those pipes.
4. Start working out and speaking with an Austrian accent.
3. I can't give specifics yet, but it involves Ted Danson.
2. Fire the staffer who suggested I do this Lousy Top 10 List instead of actually campaigning.
1. Oh, I don't know -- maybe fewer, red-faced rants.


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